I hope you never lose your sense of wonder

you get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger..

sometimes it is refreshing for me to read this book my mom gave me a few years back, it reminds me of the song "I hope you dance" by; Lee Ann Womack. the song is beautiful and she has such a soft-tone voice it makes the song that much better...

and when you get the choice to sit it out or dance, i hope you dance....




here i am; dancing in my life, taking it all in..
the weekend came and went, quickly, but we got lots and lots of work done :) we cleaned up the back & it is looking really nice out there, in about a couple months, we plan to lay some sod.... hopefully we can get it rented before then. our little pool for kambria finally bit the dust :( it was a blow up one, so we decided if we wanted to get a little one for the back, it was going to have to be the plastic kind..or just make tons of trips to the aquatic center...which both sound pretty okay to me....

i've been taking a little bit of a break from the blogging due to some un-wanted pains in my stomache that arrived late sunday night, lemme tell ya, NOT FUN! i was hoping mother nature was just working her way in and would soon arrive and the cramps would leave, but alas, no mother nature and after 2 days no cramps :) so i guess right now, i cant complain... although i will be complaining if she decides to come on our trip... boooo! our stops for feeding and diapering of the babe will turn into some sort of diapering for myself...
totally what im wantin here!
........................NOT...............................
i will go with the flow...
hahah, get it?  yaaa.... kinda cheesy!
this week is already flying by like the weekend, usually the week is so slow and the weekend is so fast, in this case, everything is just going too fast... yah i said it, too fast... i just want it to slow down.. kambria and i had a nice walk to check the mail the other day and found this..

bella donna means 'beautiful woman' 

and the other day as i was sitting in the chair rocking berlyn, i found this on my lap..

I couldnt help but to sit there and laugh, i didnt even move to get up.. i guess i was there, 'taking it all in'! i was in luck that josh was home and could clean up berlyn while i cleaned myself up :) sorry if any of you are offended by this picture or if it grossed the crap outta ya... ;) it's life...live it and love it baby!!

yesterday..was.....DRUM ROLL.....
kambria & mommy day
we had lunch at fudruckers, her choice, not mine, i think she picked it because we still had our eye on the movie theater and she wanted to make sure we would still be able to get tickets, as soon as a large group walked in, she was ready to go! we had a lovely lunch, chatting about our trip to california, tomorrow, we talked about the beach, the salt water, the sharks, the sand, our hotel with our own kitchen, seeing aunt cc, seeing grammy, seeing aunt steph and uncle kev :) we are both so thrilled. then we talked about kindergarten :( i almost started crying just talking about it with her, i am so sad i will not get to have my mornings relaxing with both of my baby girls in the chair with me, having breakfast together at 10 am, and spending the day doing WHATEVER we want. she told me she has to grow up, otherwise me and josh will keep growing up, then we will die and when she finally grows up she will have no one and she will be sad and alone, that made me 204930243232I409823904 TIMES MORE SAD. she is going to rock at being a kindergartenER,i know it ;) she is going to turn into a social butterfly and she is going to love to learn.

after we had our happy talk(beach) then sad talk(kindergarten) we went into the theater and  we went and saw "despicable me" the kid movies are just getting greater and greater and i believe i love them as much as kambria, if not more.. the theater was packed, we had to sit on the end, which isnt usually our favorite spot, but we made it very cozy.. we lifted the arm chair up and cuddled next to eachother while we relaxed and watched the movie, along with the help of some sour skittles and milk duds it turned out to be a great show!

we ventured off and walked the mall a little bit afterwards, there was this new shoe shop about two stores down and they had baby girl HIGH HEELS, kambria was in show heaven. of course i let her pick out a pair, there she was just a walkin' down the mall.. :) soo cute watching her trying to balance in heels. shes a pro, dont even trip. we decided to go pick up baby sis and go home and have a spa night, so...we did :)

ok so i may have went wrong on mixing, for our at home facial.. oatmeal facial to be exact, next time ill be sure to follow all directions :)
i did her toes and i of course had to let her do mine...

she loves to paint anyones toes, she may even grow up to be a painter because this girl loves to paint just about anything :)

its now time for me to get back to my laundry duties today since we are off to california tomorrow to soak up the beach :)
and for the biggest surprise of all... DISNEYLAND...
it is going to be a true fantasy at the happiest place on earth :)

Friday I'm In Love

Friday was so lovely. First let me say, Berlyn LOVES to feed herself. She has a little dipper that she can hold and deep into her food and she is a pro. Josh showed her how and she followed right behind him, dipping her little spoon into the green beans and putting it in her mouth, it was soo dang cute. Girl's got skills! I can't believe she is 5 months old already, she was almost born half a year ago. CrAzY...seems just like yesterday I was a huge lobster carrying baby girl around tucked inside my belly... and now, she is here...with us :) Kambria is getting SO good at holding her and she even walks around with her...of course with someone standing right close... her face lights up and she is happy in love. <3

The girls and I went and visited lindsey and hunter yesterday and hung out for several hours...Kambria got to put makeup on aunt lou lou and do her hair.... made her lookin and smellin like a million bucks, she was date material! haha... hunter and berlyn did much better around eachother, berlyn only got scared when the dog would come up and sniff her face or try and lick her, but otherthan that she was rolling all over the place and by place i mean HUNTER, too... she is a little roller that cant be stopped.


When Josh came home from work we through things together and headed to the aquatic center... it was a blast. i cant even count how many times kambria and i went down the slide together, after my turn was up she grabbed josh and took him for a ride, too! berlyn was in awww of all the people there and all of the water splashing and kids yelling.

kambria is a fish that could swim all day, no doubt! i must say her lil sis is going to be just like her, cause she was sure diggin the water, too! our plans for this HOT, HOT saturday include; fix up the back, which means get rid of the rusty chairs parked in the corner, pull all the weeds, say bye-bye to the dead flowers, swap out the broken table for perhaps a new one?, josh's great invention of tire plant holders has come to an end and alas' figure out while our sweet little pool keeps deflating!! :D sounds great to me, i love having everything clean and nice... like i said before we are in the process of renting our condo so we need to get our little projects done asap.

we usually try and work on our 'big' projects when kambria is with her daddy, since she is spending the day/night with him tonight i hope we can get finished... as much as she loves to clean i spare her a full day of that ;)

i guess a day like today could be called 'all work and no play' until berlyn wakes up from her beauty sleep, then the playing begins! :) <3

Thursday is that you?

Wow, what a week... I can't believe It's already Thursday. This week has literally flown by for me, anyone else? I am still so excited and happy to announce that my house is still clean, as I am typing this I have laundry & dishes going, to catch up on some other little things around the house, but other than that, it's pretty nice...ahhh yeah. Lindsey is still here & I can't wait to see her again tomorrow and get some chatting in (:
here are some pictures from her arrival on Sunday.

Kambria getting out of the car, still not knowing what was going on..

Kambria & her cousin Hunter.

Kambria, Me & Hunts..

Hunter & Berlyn * Birthday Twins*

Hunter & Berlyn again :) (please excuse my large bird nose taking up the whole camera lense)

The little ones didn't know what to think of eachother, actually, I wish I could have been inside their heads at the time..Hunter was trying to eat Berlyn and Berlyn was crying because she was so scared. It was pretty funny, when they came over the next day, they were much more happier and aware to be around eachother
:) boy am I so glad I didn't have two babies at one time though, that would have been TOUGH...Nanny 911!! Kambria is such a great big sissy and a great big cousin (: She is so proud everytime she can hold one of them like a big girl (:

Tuesday dance nights came around again, this time Kambria wanted to have the prettiest hair there, So I fixed it a little fancy for her

She is growing into such a young lady, right before my eyes. I wish it would stop and turn around, so I can do it all over again. I have less than a month with her until she is off to Kindergarten. Everytime I think about it I cry, I know when the day comes I am going to flood the classroom, that's what I'm hoping for anyways, then she can't leave me :) haha... Actually I know she needs to go to school to learn and to grow. She isn't my little caterpillar anymore, she is a gorgeous butterfly!


and then it became Thursday... so quickly :) which is very exciting. we have plans to work on the back this weekend, clean things up back there since we are in the process of trying to rent our condo out (: lots of fun in the sun, right?

and here are my lovely girls this morning

sorry that the quality of the pictures from my camera phone are about the quality of a cheap trash bag that leaks all the way to the garage door as you try and take it out (: yes, i've bought them before and let's just say, i won't make that mistake again.


and a funny story for ya'll...( it's okay for me to laugh about it now because the pain is slowly drifting away)
i tucked kambria all snuggly into her bed last night and was coming down the stairs with her glass of chocolate milk, maybe I was in a hurry? Josh and I were watching 'remember me' downstairs. Well the next thing I knew was I slid maybe 5-6 stairs and I was at the bottom, the glass shattered everywhere, I hit my butt/tailbone SO hard and my head flew back and hit the stairs. It was not a happy situation for anyone :( Kambria came running down stairs & started crying as soon as she saw my crying, Josh and Berlyn came running around the corner, Berlyn started crying. Luckily I had Josh there to clean everything up and finishing putting Berlyn to sleep, while Kambria took care of me. It was the cutest thing EVER. She was holding my hand, rubbing my hair, told me to think of "nice" things, like my dogs when I was little, or my pet unicorn, that's when I lost it....It hurt so bad to laugh but I couldn't hold it in. Kambria was racing around the house, from the kitchen, to the living room, to the bathroom, like a Dr. that was taking care of 50 patients. She was putting band aids on me and dabbing the medicine off with Berlyns wipes. SO CUTE and caring. She has a heart of gold. She said it was her job to stay with me until she went to sleep and she would not be going to sleep before me :) sneaky girl, tryin to get extra awake time!.. To sum it all up, when Josh took over, she gave him a paper with instructions on how to take care of me and she ended up sleeping in our bed, juuustttt to make sure I would be alright.


and here we are at love again....she is love and knows how to love. I am so blessed to have her, Josh & Berlyn in my life and I can't think God enough!

sleep

This is titled sleep because; I NEED SLEEP. For about 3 weeks now I have had the worst time falling asleep when it comes bedtime. I am so tired through-out the day and so ready for bed when it's time but it seems as soon as I lay down in my big, comfy, clean bed, I can't fall asleep. Sometimes I lay there for 2 hours, sometimes for 3, it just depends and I reaaalllyyy hate it.

Berlyn has also been having some weird sleeping patterns lately. She has been sleeping through the night since April and by sleeping through the night I mean going to sleep at 10:30 waking up around 7. Can't complain about that and I haven't :) BBUUUTTT... last night her sleep schedule was like this; asleep at 930, up at 12(which I was still wide awake) asleep at 1, back up at 1:45(right when I was just falling asleep), asleep at 3:30, then from 3:30-5 she was up off and on, wanting me to rock her to sleep, all taking about 15 minutes, finally at 5am I decided I was so sleepy I couldn't even stand up anymore or walk, or do anything, so I put her in bed with me and we slept until 7:20.

I have been lagging alllll day long. Durango Joes was delish, but sorry, still didn't do the job of giving me a burst of energy! Berlyn doesn't like to be put down, at all... she is slightly spoiled :) I usually have to eat standing up, with her on my hip. Go potty with her laying on the mat right in front of me, shower when she naps... It is kinda tough, ESP when I am juggling do it all with nooo sleep. Luckily Kambria's friend was able to play with her today to keep her distracted of no energy mama..her and her friend Channing had such a great time swimming in Kambria's little pool outback. It isn't some huge, fance, built in, awesome "WOW, LOOK AT THAT THING." kind of pool, but it works for us and the girls love it :) I am hoping the girls & I can take a little dip in it tomorrow...

    Channing & Kambria :) Happy girls!!

Get it Girl!! ( Kambria doin' some tricks :) )

Kambria posing

Channing Posing

  
   Even though I was so sleepy today I was glad to see them having fun and enjoying summer together :) Soakin in the rays!
A very special visitor arrived Sunday evening... LINDSEY.... Kambria didn't have a clue, she had been asking when she could see Aunt Lou Lou again (Lindsey lived here, then moved to CA about a month & a half ago, Lindsey is Kambria's Auntie on her dad's side) Lindsey got here on Sunday and is staying until the 19th....SCOOREE... Kambria had no idea where we were going or what we were doing, it was a surprise for her, so we blind-folder her, she she wouldn't get to peek any :) Lindsey took the blind fold off of her when we got there.

She was so cute asking all the questions in the world and feelin' around to what was around her, even though we were still in the car :) So Lindsey has a baby named Hunter and her and Berlyn were born on the same day, they are just hours apart! I didn't have my camera with me when we got some snaps of them together, so I am waiting for Lin to upload & send them my way, first!

Linds & Hunts are coming over tomorrow for coffee & cinnamon rolls....yummmyy! :)



I will leave you with some little pictures here and there from over the weekend :)


Me :)

Berlyn with sleepy eyes and a drooly shirt :)

I hope everyone is living in LOOOVEEE......:) Now off to drink some sleepy time tea & get to bed!

Princess Party

Today was the day, the day Kambria had been counting down for, making a line through the days on the calendar that had already passed. Collettes Princess Party!! Kambria got a new party dress and new party shoes, she was ready to go!....So was I with my camera in hand, I literally snapped photos right and left, until at the end of the party I realized I didn't have the memory card in the camera..WHATT!!! Yes, I almost cried :( at least those girls will have the party right in their memory. I had take two pictures with my phone camera, which as I've said before...SUCKS.. I will still post so you can try and get a visual.

This party was off the hook, I wish I could of had my last birthday party here. The girls all got to pick out a big girl dress to put on in a very special changing room decorated with glitters, flowers, pictures and goodies, they got their nails painted at the princess party, they rocked hannah montana jams the entire time, they got to rock out, they did karaoke, they danced around the mall, got their hair did and make-up on! What a FUN filled time and I must say, they all looked so beautiful like little young ladies! :) After the princess party we went back to their house for food, cake and a HUGE pinata....

My daughter(Kambria) was in the blue :-) All the girls had such a great day today, I loved watching every minute of it and all the smiles on their faces. Kambria is tucked nicely in her bed sound asleep from her busy day. Berlyn enjoyed watching everything and seeing new faces/new faces. Oh how I love spending time with my family, nothing is better and nothing will ever be better.

It's a good thing you're bulletproof.

I finally saw Eclipse last night. Yeah, I've been waiting forever to see it and I finally did. My friend Danielle & I went to the 7:30 showing, I was looking pretty hot I must say. Being a mother of two, one being only 5 months old and one being a rambunctious little 5 year old it is awfully hard to catch a shower during the day & if I do, it is even more hard to try & put some makeup on and actually blow-dry my hair..I went to the movies last night with wet hair(in braids) and no make-up on. That was the first time, EVER... There is a first time for everything, right? I never thought that day would come, but it did and it actually felt great.. I wasn't there to show off my fresh face of make-up or my bouncy clean blow-dryed hair, I was there to see a movie and I saw it.

Call me crazy but I LOOOVEEE those movies... They are very addicting and keep you wanting more, kinda like when you open up a box of girl scout cookies and you say you are going to stop after two, then you look down and the whole box is half eaten. So the moving was amazing, of course & I enjoyed watching it and getting out of the house for a bit. Danielle is one of my good friends that I have made while I have been here in Farmington, New Mexico. I met her in cosmetology school and was just recently in her wedding in Las Vegas NV in June 2010. Things have been so crazy for both of us since we've gotten back we haven't gotten a chance to do anything together so last night felt nice to be with a friend.

.....Josh was also super-dad last night..Kambria had one of her friends over for a sleep over(Jayden) so Josh had the duties of ;bathing 3 girlies, getting them their nightly snacks & trying to put them to bed all snug in a bug :-) Josh is so amazing when it comes to doing that. Another reason why I said "YES". It is still so crazy to think I am getting married, I can't wait..

So as I type this Berlyn is finally napping, after being up for 7 hours, she fights sleep like no other, I guess she just loves to be up and involved with everything going on, when she fights her sleep she gets so fussy and doesn't want to partake in anything except walking around on my hip while I hold her.. Soo the past 5 hours, that's what I've been doing.. She has been trying to go back to sleep since 11:30, poor baby girl :(. I hope she gets some good sleepin' in so she can wake up and feel refreshed! This mama needs to fold laundry, do the dishes, clean, get a shower, wash some bottles and clean...Honestly none of that sounds good right now except curling up on the couch ( what I am doing now ) and doing nothing... well I am blogging, but it's not much work for me to do :)

I am so happy it's the weekend and we all get to spend it together as a family. Kambria has her princess party tomorrow that she has been counting down the days on the calendar fo
r, she is ready to put on her new "party dress". ..then something GREAT happens Sunday, LINDSEY arrives.... :) as I said before, Lindsey is kinda like a sister in law to me..she is Kambrias aunt.. Kambrias dad is her brother.. getting the drift? catchin the wave? riding the horse?..yeahh, thought so :) berlyn and her daughter(hunter)were born on the same day, we cannot wait to get them together to have some 5 month old fun... of course snap some awesome pictures in there too...SOO I hope everyone has a rockin' friday night...
and I'll leave you with some random pictures to make you happy
   *Kambria, Berlyn, Mine & Josh's shadow*

*Swimming @ the pool.(Berlyns first time)*

My girls snoozing on my lap <3

Kambria Adison

Berlyn Amrie

      Spread the looooveee.

love

I asked Josh the other day what the biggest word he knew was, I don't even remember what his reply was(obviously too big for me to know or remember :) ) and I don't even know why I asked him that or why I even wanted to know... and then I started thinking about the biggest word that I knew was.. This comes from me sometimes being self-conscious of my smarts... I guess that's how I would put it? I don't know big words and I don't know a whole lot of stuff but the biggest word to me is; LOVE. Love is such a deep word to me and is endless. There is no time-line on love; no interest rate that is going to change in a year, no lease that will be up in 6 months, no cancellation fee or return policy, just simple love. I love to love and I love to be loved, it's the greatest feeling in the world. Last night I felt ginormous amounts of love.. Kambria and I haven't had a date in almost two weeks, I try to break away with just her and I to go on a special outing. The nail shop is our number one spot for mommy/daughter pedicures!

and we always have some sort of coffee or ice cream stop in there too :) we have found a new-found love we both like to enjoy, a nice massage. They have a place in the middle of the mall that is $6 for 6 minutes or $15 for 15 minutes. It is so nice to relax and to see Kambria relaxing on that massage table and soaking in some love.

It is always so special to Kambria & so special to me to get our time together. She is adjusting to having a little sister so well but adores when she gets some big girl time with mommy in....so that brings me to last night, she asked if she could take a bath with me, it's been awhile since we have bathed together so I thought why not? I sprinkled rose pedals on the bathroom floor, lit some candles, put some grape juice in wine cups & WA,LA...a nice romantic bath with my sweet baby girl. Not only did I get to enjoy the bath with Kambria, but Berlyn joined shortly after we knocked over a wine glass and had to call Josh in for clean up duty.  Berlyn was just about to soak up some love in her own bathtub but little did she know, she was just about to have the bath of her life with mommy and sissy. Berlyn LOVED it, she was cracking up laughing the whole time and splashing around. I wish we would of had the camera there, although those pictures would not have been G or even PG rated for that matter...nonetheless, it was all pure love. I loved soaking in the bath with both of my baby girls. We didn't plan for the wineglass to break, but we managed and continued our romantic candle-lit bath anyways! Kambria did propose an idea I should have though of a long time ago....plastic wine cups... :) yeppp, I will be searching for some fancy ones for her. She likes to pretend she is all grown up, drinking out of fancy cups, wearing high-heels, having the "bump" in her hair, buttt she isn't quite ready to handle an actual wine glass yet, sometimes plastic really is better :) 

So here is my fancy conclusion for all you out there reading this, love really is the answer and you really are better off with some love in your life!

tiny dancer in my hand

Kambria Adison is a "tiny dancer in my hand". Kambria was born to show-off. She was born to sing and dance. She loves performing. Watching her at her dance class just lights me up because I know how lit up she is inside. I can just see her heart fluttering inside, while her feet flutter on the outside. Kambria has dance every tuesday for 45 mins, in the fall she wants to sign up for twice and week, she even wants to explore and do a little hip hop. :) I love seeing her happy, I love seeing her have fun and I love to see her dance.

                          

                                    Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man
                             Ballerina, you must have seen her dancing in the sand

 

While big sissy was getting her dance on with all of her little ballet friends, little sissy was having some fun herself, chowing down on some carrots! Berlyn is such an eater, she is growing up TOO fast, TOO soon. She loves her veggies, I must say. Whenever we get her veggies out with her spoon and put her bib on, her legs start to kick, her mouth starts opening and her hands go flying everywhere. Like a little bug getting ready to fly. Her nickname is "bug" by the way. We aren't sure how we came up with her nickname, but it's hers and I must say, she owns it! She is my little love bug<3

      

      There is daddy(josh)feeding baby(berlyn). :) Oh how I love tuesday evenings, it brings us all joy. 

  Speaking of joy, that is something I did not feel a few hours prior to Kambrias dance. I am so very lucky to stay home with the girls right now and I wouldn't have it any other way, I am not sure how I am going to cope with having to go back to work soon, guess I will cross that bridge when it comes right in front of me, anyways... since I am able to stay home, I try to keep things fun for Kambria so she doesn't get so bored and want to cry of boredom, before the dance, it was park day. I had been craving a starbucks since I had woken up that morning(yesterday am) so the plan was after we did our errands and before the park we would stop and get a starbucks, what JOY, right? Oh, it was so tasty, a nice cold drink on a nice hot sunny day, which by the way, speaking of "hot, sunny day" Kambria wanted a hot chocolate, yes, a hot chocolate, i didn't think starbucks was going to let me get up to the window to get my hot chocolate, at the order window, they were acting like giving me child hot chocolate was some sort of child abuse... butttt, she wanted it, so, she got it.. :) she drank it all, too! Okay, so rewind a little bit, back to me loving my venti carmel frapp with an xtra shot added in there, it was soo delish, we got to the park and of course I forgot the stroller, again.. So as we were walking trying to find a nice shady tree to park at, my arms felt like they were about to fall off, I thought I was carrying 10 babies and 10 starbucks, maybe even some heavy building blocks, too! When we found our spot I was so relieved to put everything down on the ground... yep, on the ground..

BOOOHOOO.. I literally about cried, I think maybe a tear even ran down my face. I felt like I had waited SO long and walked SO far for that drink. Bye Bye. My sadness went away after Josh got home from work and asked Kambria if she wanted to go to the store with him, they came back with flowers, starbucks & my fav candy. :) JOY!! Then off we went to dance. Everyday isn't always as good as a starbucks all in one piece in the cup......and everyday isn't as bad as a starbucks spilled everywhere on the ground, right? :)

   I am loving this blog that I have and I am so happy I signed up for one.. Even though I am the worlds worst speller and I am not that great of a writer, I like to pretend that I am whenever I come sit down and start typing, my fingers just move and don't stop. I like it :) I also have a wedding website if you'd like to check it out, still in the process of working on that one, too..

www.mywedding/joshbristol. 

Adios, you little dancers.